I’m staring headlong in the Peoples Republic of China. Literally. From my hotel on Hong Kong island, I can see Kowloon across Victoria Harbor. Kowloon is the very tip of a peninsula called the New Territories, which became Chinese territory about 10 years ago when Britain gave them back.50 miles inland from Kowloon is the Peoples Republic of China border.
Tomorrow I cross the harbor, walk through the border, and don’t come back until Autumn. And I couldn’t be more excited!
After two intense bootcamps with Future in Singapore and Hong Kong, my intense lust for Asian women is temporarily satiated. That is, of course, a temporary condition. One which can easily be remedied by a short walk through Lan Kwai Fong district any given night…or The Bund if you’re in Shanghai…or Hou Hai if you’re in Beijing.
I need both hands and most of my toes to count the number of times I’ve heard “The Speech” in the last week alone. It’s as if there is some secret pamphlet that gets circulated to Asian girls mere moments before they don miniskirts and makeup for the first time, instructing them how to tell guys:
“Asian girls just aren’t like that. We need to be taken out and taken care of before we get romantic with a guy. You know, we have a different culture here, and you need to treat us real well before we even think of sleeping with you”
The worst part is, so many guys have accepted this dogma as fact without trying to poke any holes in the argument. Or trying to poke anything else for that matter.
After three Love Systems tours through Asia and helping many many guys over this booby trap (no pun intended), I’m calling “Shenanigans!” Not even three hours after a cute Singaporean girl delivered a particularly eloquent version of The Speech to my man Future…in reference to me hitting on her…did I take her home and disprove the whole faulty premise.
Bragging? Not my style. But someone has got to call a spade a spade. And this Summer. This hot, humid, awesome Summer of 2010. That someone is me!
“Cultural Differences” is the catch-all buzzword for that guys ascribe to whatever limiting beliefs get in the way of their Asiatic romantic interludes. Yes, there are definitely some cultural differences between China and, say, America. But they are more due to the way censorship shapes the way people use technology, then they are to some differing means by which boys and girls become lovers.
o ”I had fun talking, but I gotta get back to my friends. Let’s stay in touch though!” – Well, she won’t be your new Facebook friend. At least not in mainland China where Facebook is port-blocked.
o ”Come on back to my place, I gotta show you this awesome new YouTube video!” – Not gonna work here buddy. Same story. Censored.
Ditto that for Twitter, FourSquare, and pretty much anything else where the Chinese thought police can’t exertdirect editorial content control.
Sooo, what exactly does that leave? Well, text messages and phones still work last time I checked. And Chinese are all about instant messaging (QQ.com in the mainland, but most other IM clients work too).
“But Starlight, Starlight, how can I keep up with your awesome tweets and bad-ass facebook status updates when you go behind the Great Firewall?” – Ah! Good question young padowan. And fortunately I’ve got a solution
Over the coming months I’ll be deep inside the belly of the Dragon. Studying Chinese, making new friends and tinkering with a new business idea. All the while you won’t miss a beat. Why? Because I got some special special secret sauce going on that let’s me access the Internet just like I was back home in the only city with more hot girls per capita then parking meters (San Francisco…obviously!)
So, with no further ado. I hereby kickoff Starlight’s Summer Travelogue: Busting Myths and Delivering the Goods from within The Middle Kingdom!
Let Freedom Ring,
~ Jesse Starlight ~
Love Systems Asian Style – Busting Myths and Delivering the Goods is another post by Dating Coach Starlight. Other similar posts include: