Dating Coach Starlight

For anyone who is here and wasn’t following the Project Rockstar thread, I’m posting a couple field reports to let you into my secret Starlight world. Here is a recent LR born from an impromptu trip to Shanghai courtesy of the legendary Eskay:

Aug 25, 2008

Traveling first class with Eskay starts from the train ride to the airport. Mr and M rendezvoused at Paddington to take the Heathrow Express first class. Our excitement is palpable as this quickly arranged excursion gets under way. We enter The Virgin Lounge at Heathrow and it looks like a high-end nightclub. There are no prices on the menu…everything is complimentary and unlimited. Flying Upper Class on Virgin is an experience in and of itself. There are proper beds, a bar with blacklights underneath and many movie selections. We all got a little tipsy and Eskay hit on two of the stewardesses, one of which, consensus is, he’ll close at some point. I watched No Country For Old Men and passed out in comfort.

Only to awake to our descent into Shanghai. We passed over what looked like endless fields of agriculture and red roof rural houses. Then all of sudden we are in China. Whoa. Mr M and I breezed through customs with nary a second glance, however Eskay was held up for the better part of 45 minutes while 12 Chinese customs agents inspected his passport (which has like 10 Chinese visas) deciding whether to let him in the country. My first contact with the natives involved walking into a duty free store and asking the exchange rate. Me, tall, blond and totally non-Asian, was surrounded by 6 people who didn’t speak any English smiling and nodding at me, then pointing down the hallway.

We took the Maglev train into town. This thing is a floating, magnetically powered hyper-speed train that peaked out at 431km/hr whilst rural China quickly evaporated into a dense forest of skyscrapers and freeways.

Going that fast, it took us under 10 minutes to cover the distance into town. Eskay’s Chinese is in tact and entirely helpful, as the taxi driver took us on some crazy circuitous route through the city, finally arriving at Hyatt on The Bund. Eskay booked us a massive penthouse suite overlooking the river and old city. A mind-blowing continuous parade of ships continue in both directions at all hours; floating the initial leg of the journey that like 60% of our manufactured goods travel from East to West.

After a quick freshening up we took a cab across town to a top-secret “house of relaxation and pleasures” that was closed to all foreigners until very recently. As it is, you have to come with someone who is known and accepted. Eskay is such a man. Quickly I found myself in a shower with a curvaceous Chinese girl, naked, sitting on a stool which was two cushions and an open center. She shampooed my hair, sensuously washed my body, and worked in between my legs while nibbling on my ear. Once clean we went into the next room and I laid down while she went down. Moments later she tied a red satin rope to the top of the bedframe, tested it to make sure it was especially taut, then slung herself up into it, twirled around upside down with her hands behind her back on my manhood. Whoa! Never seen that before;)

After that experience we sat in a lounge area in our robes watching the Olympics, Eskay smoking Chinese cigarettes, while a sexy, thin girl cleaned my ears perfectly. The owner came over after hearing from his manager that Eskay was in town and shook all our hands, giving us a card saying that we are now welcome anytime. On our way back to the hotel we traded stories of what happened in our respective rooms…there was Fire n Ice…there were vibrators…there was trapeze artists blowjobs. It was entirely crazy.
A quick rest in the hotel rejuvenated us all and we prepared for the real evening’s events: A Shanghaiese dinner with 12 friends, followed by Lounge 18 with a VIP table, then an after party at our suite in the Hyatt!

Dinner was incredible, I’ve never had Chinese food like that. It was camphor smoked duck and sweet tofus, baijo liquour and sticky rice soup, all served dim sum style on a rotating tray. Present were high-level guys from Google, entrepreneur friends of Eskay, fun, friendly and numerous attractive hotel industry girls. Seeing how it’s Mr M and my first time in China we were pressured to drink 6 shots of baijo…a very very strong clear liquor that burns going down. Leaving the restaurant we were an entourage, piling into 4 different cabs to drive excitedly over to Lounge 18 where our table awaited.

Here is Saturday night in Shanghai. A club overlooking the Bund and most of new town Shanghai, lights and towers in both directions with boats parading back and forth on the Bund. Westerners interspersed with Chinese, mingling, drinking and dancing. We’re at a collection of couches with bottle after bottle of champagne coming out, sparklers going off with each new ice bucket. Sound and lights, Shanghai nights, I’m feeling the city and loving the sights.

Mr M and I go around the bar and do some cold approaches, periodically returning to our table for dancing, drinking and building ever stronger social proof. Soon I was in super-state and talking to everyone. A well-endowed Chinese girl and I ended up on the couch talking about all the delicious things she could cook me and giving me a back massage while I rubbed her thigh. We elope upstairs to Bar Rouge, which is on the seventh floor, and steal a VIP table on the outside balcony where I learn all about Shanghai girls lives and what it’s like to live in China. Then making out passionately and enjoying the magnificent view.

Random excerpts from the night include dancing on speaker stacks with a Dutch girl, Eskay dropping a bottle of champagne, which exploded and shot straight into his face, followed by popping a new bottle and drinking it straight. Mr M opening every single blond girl in the bar. Me diving on top of a Venezuelan and Pakistani girl for photos. At 3:00am I was ready to go home with my girl, so we sorted logistics and bounced.

Now back in the 27th floor, looking down on the balcony we sat on moments before, our clothes peeled off and I she showed me how much she likes to please, including some special tricks with her tounge. The lights of Shanghai flicker all around and then we lay without a sound. Peaceful. China. Here. Now. With her.

…Then I hear thundering footsteps and yelling voices. I brace her for the entourages arrival. Mr M slams the door open and runs in yelling “Dude, this girl is DTSR, get up muthaf*cker and go get in the Jacuzzi”

“Um, hey man, so I’m in bed with this girl here (who is hiding beneath the covers) so, why don’t you go and I’ll be there in a minute”

After some funny interchanges and me laughing that my girl doesn’t want to be seen at all, I get them out and she dresses and goes, kissing me and leaving her number.

Fair enough, I throw on my board shorts and go into the other room. Theres 5-6 people half girls. The Jacuzzi is running, bottles are popping. The lights of Shanghai visible from all rooms through the floor-to-ceiling windows. Eskay and I wind up in the Jacuzzi with this girl, who knows I was just in bed with some other girl, and whilst we’re splashing around and blowing bubbles at each other, a room service attendant appears with a bottle of champagne. He is shocked. I blow bubbles at him and kiss the girl, then Eskay kisses her and the room service guy quickly gets a signature and disappears.

Apparently Mr M was f*cking with me about the DTSR and Eskay was wondering what in the hell I was doing in the Jacuzzi with him and this girl rubbing my hands all over her and encouraging her to make out with him. This didn’t come out until later at which point we all cracked up. Eskay was wondering if I was trying to take his chic, I thought I was escalating towards a threesome and Mr M was in the other room laughing his ass off. Ha!

So I jumped out of the hot tub and Mr M and I ordered room service at 5am, eating it and debriefing the night while the sun slowly rose over Shanghai out our window. By 6am we threw in the cards and slipped off to sleep, as you might guess, smiling:)